The Collection
by Mako1
Summary: Superboy and Kid Flash need a place to recover from a fight.  They decide to crash at Red Robin's new home and meet his girlfriend Tam...and Tam's collection of oddities.


DCU, Tim/Tam, meet the parents brothers (and/or Titans).

The first time Tamara Fox met any of Tim's Titan friends, was one evening when she and Tim were returning home after a successful day of getting the board of directors to see things their way. Tim had finally gotten his plush flat in Crime Alley set up and Tam had moved in at his request. Tim was still feigning recovering gunshot victim for the press, and Tam was still enjoying playing along. She unlocked their door and was about to walk in, when she spied the body on the sofa. She could also hear movement in the kitchen…and singing. Stepping aside so Tim could see what was going on, she puzzled at first when he chuckled and continued on in. She followed cautiously and closed the door behind her. That's when she saw the tee the body on the sofa was wearing. Solid black with the Superman 'S' emblazoned on it in bright red. Superboy was the body. At least he appeared to be breathing.

"Hey KF?" Tim called out. A red and gold blur zoomed out from the kitchen and Tam blinked in surprise.

"Dude, Tim we just got he…oh shit," Bart stammered when he spied Tam.

"It's cool. This is Tam the one I was telling you about…the one who knows all my dirty little secrets," Tim smirked, setting his crutches aside. "Tam Fox, meet…" Tim stalled, waving his hand in a circular motion at Bart.

"Bart Allen, aka Kid Flash," Bart replied, lowering his mask. "If Tim trusts you then I'm totally cool trusting you too."

"Hi…what happened to him?" Tam asked, leaning in to take a better look at Superboy to assure herself that he was indeed still alive. She stepped back when he groaned and looked like he was about to come to. She didn't want to be in the line of fire in case he freaked and zapped her with his eyeball lasers, as she had once dubbed his heat vision.

"We were dealing with Hydra, and they had kryptonite," Bart explained. "Your place was the closest safe house," he added. Tim rummaged around in a closet as Bart talked. He pulled out a portable lamp and set it up next to Superboy.

"I feel like shit," Superboy muttered from the sofa. Tim turned on the lamp and Superboy sighed. "Always prepared," he murmured as he soaked in the artificial sunlight.

"What happened with Hydra?" Tim asked, sitting on the edge of the sofa to remove his braces.

"We slowed them down and the Justice League came in to fini…" Bart trailed off as he spied two bell jars on the mantle. Superboy cracked an eye open and looked up at Bart. He followed to where the speedster was looking and spied the jars that had rendered Bart speechless.

"Oh my God you are a freak," he started as Tim pointed towards Tam who folded her arms across her chest and beamed with pride. "…and I love it! Tell me they're real," he asked and Tam grinned.

"Wednesday and Pugsley are indeed real authentic shrunken heads," she replied. "Hi I'm Tam by the way," she finished.

"Superboy, Kon, or Conner…take your pick," Kon replied. "And you are officially the coolest chick I have ever met," he added.

"Likewise," Bart added. "You freaking named them too?" Tam nodded. Bart gestured towards Tim. "I know he's got more money than God, and I suppose he's hot and everything. But if you're ever bored with him, I'm ridiculously well read, have super speed, and can take you anywhere in the world in a flash," he propositioned.

"Bart…I have the super glue gun from hell with your name on it," Tim threatened darkly.

"Aww Timmy loves you too!" Kon grinned. Tam was just shaking her head in disbelief at the three of them.

"And before you even think of hitting on my girlfriend," Tim directed at Kon. "Just know that it is night out. I can take the lamp away. And the piece of kryptonite I have with your name on it is on the premises." Kon made kissing noises towards Tim as he spoke.

"Wow," Tam exclaimed. "And here I always thought you guys were all serious super heroes."

"Ha! Yeah right," Bart laughed.

"We're more like the Three Stooges," Kon admitted, indicating himself, Tim, and Bart.

"Unfortunately," Tim snorted. "Need anything to drink or eat?" he asked Kon. Kon shook his head.

"No thanks, I'd hurl on the carpet if I had anything right now," he replied, holding his stomach.

"I'm assuming you've already assaulted my kitchen," Tim directed at Bart.

"Just a sandwich," Bart replied. "But enough food talk," he grinned. Tim and Kon both stared at him in shock. "Tell me more about Wednesday and Pugsley…seriously I love that," he gushed. Tam barked a laugh.

"They're the crowning jewel in my collection," Tam smiled. "I think the only reason Daddy was cool with me moving in with Tim, was just so he didn't have to see them in his house anymore."

"Collection?" Bart and Kon both asked.

"There's a whole room upstairs filled with her fun stuff," Tim chuckled.

Kon had already begun using his x-ray vision to scan the floor above and finally found what Tim had been talking about. "What the fu…?"

"Okay, I need to see this collection…if that's cool with you," Bart stated looking hopefully at Tam.

"I'd be glad to show you," she grinned. Kon's hand shot out towards Tim so he could pull him off the sofa. Kon stilled as a wave of dizziness hit him before rising to his feet shakily. "You'll be okay?" Tam asked.

"Now that the dizzy spell's gone," Kon replied. Tam led the way and Tim brought up the rear. Kon and Bart entered Tam's mini museum of oddities, while Tim continued on to his room to change.

"You have a _Cephalothoracopagus monosymmetros_ specimen?" Bart grinned.

"Okay, now I am impressed," Tam smirked. "You're the only other person besides Tim that even knew what that was without me telling them."

"I told you, ridiculously well read," Bart bragged.

"Glue gun…your name on it," Tim bellowed out from his room. Bart rolled his eyes while Tam bit back a giggle.

"That looks like the one in the Mütter Museum," Kon stated, looking at the severely deformed foetal skeleton Bart had pointed out.

"It's a replica of that one," Tam said. "I'd kill for the real deal," she added. "And points to you for knowing where it came from."

"Kryptonite," Tim called out.

"Yeah yeah," Kon muttered, looking around the room. "What's that noise?" he asked as he zeroed in on a tank in the corner.

"I guess you would be able to hear them," Tam said as she walked over to the tank. "Flesh eating beetles," she replied. "They're cleaning a 'project' I'm helping some guys at school with," Tam said, waving her fingers in quotation marks.

"You actually do skeletal mounts too?" Kon asked, looking at her in awe.

"Yep…granted, what the chicks in there are going to end up as might be a bit disturbing," she replied.

"How?" Bart asked.

"Some art students I know from school want to make a morbid Easter display and I'm providing them with the bones," she explained.

"And yes, I'll bring the pictures when she gets them," Tim said as he entered the room.

"So seriously Tim, how did you land the coolest girl in the universe?" Bart asked.

"Secret bat-ninja powers," Tim smirked. Tam howled in laughter. "Little did I know when she agreed to move in that she was bringing Damian repellent," he added.

"Seriously?" Kon laughed.

"There's bits of this scattered all over the place," Tam said, indicating her curiosities.

"And Damian refuses to set foot in here, because of it," Tim added. "Hell this creeps out Bruce and Dick too."

"I am impressed," Bart chuckled.

Tim nodded. "Even with his circus background, medical curiosities tend to un-nerve Dick." Bart shook his head in amazement, while Kon suddenly shot a hand out to lean against the wall.

"You alright?" Tam asked in concern.

"I will be," Kon replied shakily. "Hydra had a pretty big chunk of S-shield repellent."

"You two want to stay the night? We have the room," Tim offered. He and Bart both took one of Kon's arms to help steady him on his feet.

"I'm gonna have to," Kon admitted. "There's no way I can make it home in this shape."

"If you're cool with it, I'm game," Bart replied.

Tim and Bart helped Kon to one of the rooms Tim had set up for guests, while Tam turned the bed down for Kon. Tim brought the sun lamp up to Kon's room and set it up. Kon fell asleep almost immediately as he let the artificial sunlight heal him from the kryptonite he'd been exposed to earlier. Satisfied that Kon would be alright, Tim showed Bart to another room. Bart called home to say he'd be spending the night at Tim's. Tim called Martha Kent and explained that Kon would be staying overnight. He assured her that Kon would be alright after a good night's sleep under the sun lamp. Tam went downstairs to start on dinner, which Bart helped her with once he'd taken a quick shower and changed.

"Forgive me if this sounds rude," Bart said, twirling his fork in his pasta. "But you don't strike me as the kind of girl that would have that." He jerked a thumb towards the room her collection was housed in.

Tam nodded at Tim and smirked. "I surprised him with my little hobby, so no, you aren't being rude."

"What got you into medical oddities?" Bart asked.

"I saw a six thousand year old trepanated skull in the Gotham Natural History Museum and fell in love," Tam admitted. Bart raised his eyebrows as Tam continued. "The fact that the patient had survived long enough for bone growth to be evident, tripped me out. My family all think I'm nuts."

"So does mine," Tim smirked. Tam swatted him playfully. "My personal favourite, is the one behind you," he added. Bart turned to look over his shoulder and spied a skull doubling as a candle holder.

"Native American?" Bart asked as he studied the bone structure.

"Mayan," Tam smiled. "And he didn't take to trepanning so well," she added.

"How many skulls do you have?" Bart asked.

"Twenty seven," Tam replied. Bart grinned.

"And do they have names like the shrunken heads?"

Tam nodded. "That's Fred behind you," she replied.

"I swear…if you're ever bored with Tim, look me up," Bart laughed. Tim shot him a look and Bart held a hand up in surrender. "I'm so gonna tell my cousin about this," he added changing the subject.

"Your cousin likes this stuff?" Tam asked hopefully.

"Oh hell no," Bart laughed.

"You just want to give him nightmares for all of eternity," Tim snorted, knowing that Bart was talking about Wally.

"What he said," Bart smirked. Tam gave him a perplexed look. "One of the Flashes," he told her. "We tend to clash."

"Ah," Tam nodded, taking a bite of dinner.

"I do have to ask though," Bart continued. "What about ethical or cultural issues with some of this stuff…like Wednesday and Pugsley?"

Tam smirked. "Good question and one I rarely hear, surprisingly enough," she said. "Several of my specimens are reproductions, like the foetal skeleton from the Mütter collection. As for Wednesday and Pugsley, they are real, but they were made for the tourist trade back in the nineteenth century."

"There's a souvenir from your trip to Peru," Tim chuckled.

"Buy me one if you're ever there?" Tam teased. Tim and Bart laughed. "All of my stuff is perfectly legal to trade in," she added. "Skulls are easy enough to come by, as most of them come from old medical schools."

"So you put your foot down on the questionable stuff?" Bart asked.

"Definitely!" Tam exclaimed. "Someone offered me a mummified hand once that their great uncle or whoever took from a tomb in Egypt. I told them to turn it over to a museum so it could be returned to Egypt…as much as I would have liked to have something like that; there is the whole ethical issue with a lot of this stuff." Bart nodded at her approvingly. "Things like that, that are national or cultural treasures, I avoid at all costs. It isn't right for some nerd with a quirky obsession to have it."

Bart glanced over at Tim. "I totally approve of your choice in girlfriends and you have my blessing." Tam nearly slid out of her chair laughing.

"Thanks…I think," Tim replied.

"Screw it up though and you can bet that I'll move in faster than you can blink," Bart added, taking a drink from his glass. "Literally." Tim back handed him on the arm.

They finished dinner and Tim asked Bart if he'd like to go on patrol with him for a bit. Bart agreed and after clearing the table and doing the dishes at super speed, he donned his costume and waited for Tim. Tam wished them good luck and a safe patrol, before turning around to tend to her other guest. Tim had recommended she serve Kon something simple, so she made a sandwich and took it up to his room, along with a glass of milk. Peaking in, Kon turned to look at her and Tam apologised for disturbing him.

"Sorry if I woke you, but I wanted to see how you were doing," she said as she set the tray down on the nightstand.

"Nah, it's cool," Kon replied, sitting up and picking up the glass of milk first. "I woke up a little while ago and was mostly just dosing."

"How do you feel?" Tam asked.

"A lot better than when I first got here," he chuckled. "Sorry if we freaked you out in any way," he added. "We didn't know that you lived here with Tim."

Tam smirked. "Did Tim ever tell you how we first met?"

"Something about him in costume, bleeding out in a hotel room," Kon replied. Tam nodded.

"After the initial shock wore off, I figured that I could handle his crazy double life."

"You figured that you'd run into his buddies sooner or later?" he asked.

"Pretty much," she said. "Granted I didn't expect the first time to consist of a body on the sofa and someone singing eighties hits, while raiding my kitchen." Kon laughed. He set the glass down and picked up his sandwich.

"I am so sorry about," he laughed. "Tim's place was the closest to where we were, and he knows how to handle kryptonite poisoning."

"And yet he threatens that he has a piece of it with your name on it," Tam said.

"I would be surprised if he didn't have a piece of it on hand to be honest," Kon admitted. "He's just human…crazy skills and all, he is only human and he works with a lot of metas. It's in his best interest to have ways to take us down, I think."

"You can't be serious?" Tam asked in astonishment.

"Totally," Kon replied. He went on to tell her about how easily Luthor had taken control of him and how disastrous that had turned out. "I hate to say it, but shit like that happens a little too often."

"I see it in the news," she admitted. "I guess I don't tend to dwell on it."

"That's very generous of you," he told her. "I still feel guilty sometimes when I think about it."

"I think you've redeemed yourself," Tam offered.

"So everyone tells me," he smirked.

"I think Tim's forgiven you if he was willing to set you up with a room and sun lamp…complete with room service no less," Tam chuckled.

"Extremely cool room service," he stated. "I heard most of the conversation you guys had over dinner."

Tam laughed. "It isn't often when I meet people who don't freak at least a little at my collection."

"Thanks for letting us drool at it…and for dinner," he said, polishing off his sandwich.

"Can I get you anything else?"

"Nope, I'm good. Unlike Bart I don't need much in the way of food," he replied. He yawned suddenly. "Excuse me," he apologised.

"Not a problem," Tam said taking up the tray. "I'll let you go back to sleep. Holler if you do need something."

Kon thanked her again as she left the room and was soon fast asleep again. Tim and Bart returned a little while later and Tam filled them in on how Kon was doing. "He should be good by morning then," Tim stated. Bart agreed with him as he stretched his lanky frame out. He sagged afterwards and yawned.

"Okay Bart go night night now," he told them as he headed for the stairs. "See ya in the morning'," he said, bidding Tim and Tam good night. They retired shortly afterwards.

"I like your friends," Tam said as she cuddled up to Tim in bed.

"We drive each other nuts, but I wouldn't trade them for the world," Tim admitted. Tam told him about the conversation she'd had with Kon and he nodded. "I keep telling him not to worry about it, but he's the way he is, I guess."

"I admit that I find it a bit strange about how normal you all are," Tam admitted. "I mean I see the news and all the incredible things you guys accomplish and then I see you joking around like regular guys in our living room."

Tim nuzzled the top of her head. "You think we're normal?" he asked.

"About two minutes after we got home," she replied. "I see three guys who are best friends, doing what best friends do…give each other hell."

"Should I be worried about how well you've adjusted to all of this?" he chuckled.

Tam propped herself up on one elbow and gazed down at him. "Spiders never used to scare me," she told him. "So I wouldn't say I've completely adjusted to your crazy ways." Tim laughed and she placed a kiss on his chest as she settled back down next to him.

"At least my teammates dropping in suddenly didn't faze you too much," he chuckled.

"I'm assuming they're going to tell the rest of your team about the collection," she surmised.

"Oh yeah," he agreed. "I think Raven would be the only one that would actually show up to take a look though."

"I look forward to it," Tam laughed.

FIN


End file.
